Orders given, orders taken
Lesbian BDSM rests on a power gap that both women agree to: one gives the orders and the other follows them. The dominant partner, called a domme or a mistress, dresses for the part in leather, latex or a corset with heels and speaks in short commands. Her submissive kneels, asks permission and addresses her as mistress.
Strict mistresses and eager subs
Each side comes in recognizable types. A strict mistress keeps her distance and says little; a teasing femdom stays close, touches and withholds. An older boss over a younger employee, both of them adults, carries an office hierarchy into the bedroom. On the receiving side, the eager sub wants to please and serves on command, down to kissing her mistress's feet, while a brat disobeys on purpose, since punishment is the attention she wants. Switches take either side, and two of them together pass the riding crop back and forth.
A safeword above every rule
Restraint and sensation are the tools of control. Rope around wrists and thighs, the heart of lesbian bondage, keeps the sub still, and so do cuffs locked to a bedpost or a spreader bar; a blindfold takes away sight, and a hand, a paddle or a crop leaves pink marks. Orgasm control is the dynamic at its purest: the sub has to ask before she comes, and the answer can be no. A mistress can also claim her pleasure by order, and facesitting with her full weight keeps the sub pinned beneath her while she serves. Limits are agreed beforehand, a safeword or the traffic-light colors stop the play at any point, and aftercare with water and a cuddle closes it. Consent is the defining feature of lesbian BDSM, and the strictest orders depend on it.
